Simple answer South74, yes. You need to be completely over your WAS. You need to have accepted there is no going back. Who knows what the long term future is, but the present is what I am talking about. When the time comes for you to have a new relationship, then you need to be prepared to put in 100%. Not constantly worry about the old marriage. That isn't to say you don't think about the old marriage, but you just don't dwell on it. You also have to be in the mindset, that you don't want your WAS back either. My sitch if you wish to read it: I spent about 19 months fighting for my marriage. I gave myself (WAS) three strikes in my mind: moved out (strike 1), split assets (strike 2) and not come back to the city when our work time was up (strike 3). I now have a beautiful new partner of just over a year, I have started divorce proceedings a few months ago and am moving on. I tried very hard to fix my marriage, for whatever reasons, nothing worked. I now have a new life, a better me and a great future to look forward to. Only you can make the decision South74, good luck with it.
Thanks for your reply . Like the 3 strikes idea and I'm at 2 strikes and my third would be her actually living with OM . So unless I fall helplessly in love with someone it's a waiting and learning and growing in myself game .
Me 40 W 37 Together 22 years S18 D12 WaW 12/08/14 after affair exposed , suspected for several months W returned home for 2 weeks to see if can handle family life After the 2 weeks she has left .
