Wife says she's out the door

[Sherman333]

This morning is better. I'm not so overwhelmed. We had S this morning that I initiated.

At coffee we did have a flare-up. We were talking about things before starting out day. I asked her what her plans were (just in case they were different than what I was expecting). I then told her what I was going to take care of while she was doing that. She took it as if I was pressuring her to get going. She got pretty pissed (I have no clue why) and I had to tell her to sit back down. I explained all I wanted to do was let her know I got the rest (kids) covered. Her response was "yeah... it's never the intent". She seems to look for things to get upset with or misinterpret. I think she's punishing me generally for all the resentment she says she has.

Most the most part, the morning went well. I've been reading Cunningham's book (it helped put things in perspective last time). For the most part we're amicable, but just stale mediocrity. I enjoy seeing this woman and genuinely enjoy spending time with her. But I know I'd be ok if we can't put it back together.

She did bring up the relationship this morning (I don't think she wants to get my hopes up). We talked about "I love you but am not in love with you" a little. I think I kinda there too overall. But I'd still like to put it together for my son. She keeps mentioning how I'm not a risk taker and that she needs more of that. White water rafting, rock climbing, etc. She counts me out so quick; I don't see myself as she does and it leaves me something to ponder. I've been in such a rut... ugh. So I'm trying to figure out what to do about it. A HUGE 180 would be to schedule a rafting trip whether she wants to come or not.

We're still going out to buy clothes. My 38" waist she bought me a few weeks ago hang loose. The 36" are a little loose as well. I'm going to try 34" pants for the first time in YEARS!!! It's a mood lifter.