I don't think you need to worry about it being too kind because ultimately your not changing your plans or promising lots of conciliatory stuff for the future, so the kindness is solely about delivering the same message in a kind way.
I don't think I'm back on moderation......
Just on the sarcasm thing, I'm actually tone my sarcasm with people I don't know or don't like way back. Usually my sarcasm is meant affectionately and friends and colleagues seem understand that. But yes throw in the other nice guy behaviours a tiny change in tone and some cumulative context stuff and a small comment that should be affectionate and amusing becomes cutting and hurtful.
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
