MLC W Dates, Part 7

[AJM]

Many of us here can relate to commitment. To one's values, beliefs, and their relationships. I know I do in a very deep way.

And like you and many of us, I do not commit easily. I take it incredibly serious when I make a commitment. It is as simple as that for me. And I sense it is for you as well.

I no way to do I see what you are doing as an 'obligation'. If it was, you would have recognized you have no further obligation to your W. She made it so regardless of the reasons.

Whether you choose to stay or go, in your own heart, is not the point I was trying to get across, and I don't think T2 was either.

What I'm suggesting is that you challenge yourself to view the next few years and what your life looks like in that future. With or without her in it.

From a religious perspective, you have every reason to push her away. She cheated and wants to date others. You can't argue with that. You can't wish it away. And you can't explain it away. You can certainly forgive, in time.

From a human perspective, you have every reason to push her away. Same as above.

The only reason you choose to do that's left, is your own. I respect that. I think most of us here do.

But as you visualize the future, be sure to keep the entire perspective. And ask yourself if you are standing for reasons you can live with. Ask yourself if that's what you want and if you're willing to pay the green fee. Ask yourself if you are doing this for your beliefs and are they the right beliefs to have for your life and what's in your life.

You're the one that has to live with the choices, so only you can answer them.

I'm sure you've honored your marriage. Your w's memory. But she's asked you to not be part of her life going forward in the same way as before. Maybe not in words, but in actions.

How does all that blend together in your visualization of the future?

I have a great deal of respect for you and your beliefs and how you follow through them. Shows great integrity. Just asking. Trying to help you clarify. It's not always clear from your posts exactly how you blend all of that together.

AJ