Wife says she's out the door

[Sherman333]

Wonder of wonders. This morning we had a better talk that she initiated. I focused on what she said/repeated pertinent items back to her, etc. She stated that what I've been doing hasn't been working and that I've been too negative from her perspective (my perspective is finances limit how much and how quick... but that's an old discussion).

When we first got together, we made a lot of plans, but life-events got in the way. We lost a lot of money on a house and things have been tight since. We both make good money though. She stated that she felt as if she'd been lied to because we never did any of things we talked about.

She asked me directly to do things 180 deg from what's been going on. She also stated that she likes all the changes she's seen, etc. Our son was trying to be overly helpful and ended up annoying her. I asked to her to be patient with him as he's nervous about things.

She says she wants new things in our lives, decluttering, moving forward on home projects, and getting new experiences... living. We had plans earlier to go shopping for new clothes for both of us. She's tired of seeing me look dumpy.

Once she was done taking a shower, she even told me that today, she want's to stay. Definitely a mood lifter. She engaged me several times to chat as well... telling me about co-workers, stuff at work, etc.

She even said we should fill out the letter of intent to adopt the foster child we have. Last night neither of wanted to even talk about it. Over a week ago, she'd told me she expected me to still proceed with the adoption on my own. I'm not sure I can do it, but the thought of my son losing 2 relationships kills me. He acted out for the first time as school yesterday... punch a kid. First time he ever went to the principle.

One issue I have with her new job is that her boss was a WAH. He's been divorced ~1.5 yrs and has 2 kids. His reasons is that his ex let herself go, didn't try to change/do things different, etc. So he's validating some of her decisions. Plus she talks about him a lot. Rather frustrating generally.