Im wishing and praying for you to have positive days going forward.
Never let him see ya sweat. Our new motto
Me 43 ring off Oct 2014 (my ring back on Feb 2015) H 51 (ring off 7/2013) M 2007 T 1996 S 14 July 2013- H told me he was unhappy.....said he is staying for Son Feb 18 2014 Found out about OW
Hey 2B- thanks. Loved the shout out this morning. And, yup... love that that we are going to strut it out together... no sweat!
bea- Thank you, thank you! Your words are so encouraging and helpful! They give me strength. I hope you are doing well.
AJ! Well.... he didn't ask me to stop. In fact, I guarantee that he would be still taking them today if I had them ready for him! He totally takes advantage. Although, that behavior from him... is helping me move on! Realizing what kind of person can do that kind of stuff. I am tired of being taken advantage of. But the elephant analogy... hmmmm... gave me something specific to think of this morning. You are so right! I need to take one thing on at a time. Face that challenge and get rid of it. I am ready to do this. I am ready to move on.
So, the anger continues today. But it's not like bitter anger. More like F you! I don't need that in my life! I'm moving on to better things.
I just want to smack myself! What have I been doing?! I don't know if this is the "stage" I am in, but I feel like I want him out of my life. For good. That I would be fine if I don't see him again. It sounds harsh, but that guy... who he is now... has nothing positive to offer me in my life. And I want nothing to do with it.
I really, really, really, really hope that this.... this anger... frustration... fed-up-ness... is what it takes to truly get me going. To catapult me into a new beginning. To start over.
I am ready to take my journey. Like... the good one. The one that doesn't consist of weeding my way out of his disaster. The one where it is all about me. Yeah, I know there will be setbacks and struggles, but I want them to be about me and my life... not a consequence or affect or anything about his.
Untangle. Emotionally. I am thinking of this stranger. The person who looks familiar... yet, looks so different. I knew a guy who resembled his appearance. But this... I don't know this guy. How could I be so emotionally attached and bothered by this person I don't know? This person who cares nothing about my well-being, and actually takes action which have been to my detriment.
No way, buddy. No more. You cannot control me. You cannot control my emotions. You cannot control my happiness. You cannot control my parenting. You have no say in my life. Nothing. Your actions, decision, and words no longer impact my life.
I have set you free; therefore, I have set myself free.
Mighty- I love me some Mrs. Doubtfire and a glass of Malbec. We just watched Dead's Poet Society the other night. It was haunting but yet so beautiful too.
Carpe Diem my friend.
M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters BD: 5/14 Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW D Final 9/17
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ― Maya Angelou
I can't stand dealing with this person. It makes me so mad. It is only a reminder of what he has done and who he has become. I wish I didn't have to. I cut my losses big time last year so j wouldn't have to, but stuff keeps coming up.
I was told that even w divorce papers, I will not qualify for the tax reduction. It is a significant amount and every homeowner get it applied to their home in nys. But ding-dong is applying to his house w HWW. I'm screwed. After dealing w the city for a week and a half, I finally texted xh and told him that the only way to qualify is to change the deed. He said no bc he won't be attached to a mortgage w "no ties" to the house. I'm like duh that's me! On mortgage- not deed. I'm like this is my home with the kids. What do you think I am going to do? He is unbelievable and I am tired of dealing with the consequences of his selfish choices. Every time I turn around. I revised every text bc I did not want it to be about anything else and w/o emotion. But... I did say, "you are a real stand up guy. She is so lucky."
After he was still deflecting the real issue, I just said that since it's in I is name, I will just send him the bill.
He said, "don't be an @ss. Fill out the forms and I will sign." Ok, he has the forms, which I had to purchase over the summer & mailed to him. But fingers crossed he will sign. But "@ss" it's like... Hello pot, meet kettle.
I was shaking during the whole thing. My heart races. It is just unbelievable who this person has become. Ick. Go away.
And I would get him off the mortgage but the banks won't give out a loan with the disaster he left! He has totally left me crippled with some of this stuff.
And when he was at the house 2 months ago he was all upset. I asked what was wrong. He said he couldn't believe what he left me to deal with. That he felt so bad about how he left me with such a disaster.
