W does not think I actually know it is still going on. She is a good mother overall. Like I have said, we do still get along and laugh about things, and come together well for our son. I know I am more of a "backup" though at this point. Made her too comfortable. I do not really bring up conversations to her. I let her approach me, and she has been doing so, just not about anything serious. It is not like we hate each other. I am irritated, naturally, that she continues to disrespect my boundaries, though I know I have done that to myself.
Any ideas of suggested actions would be appreciated. I do not want her to feel controlled, but to get the point, but I feel like if I do not tell her, that she will not see it that way.
I am actually thinking about doing some other fun things, too. Possibly completely block FB at home, or just the messenger/chat functions, "technical problems." The computer she uses is mine. I am considering taking it so I can "use it at work." She can use her laptop, then I can still block traffic to that. It can still work outside of the home though.
I played it off when she was inquiring about why her phone was acting up. "Did you drop it or hit it with something?" Really not sure if I should tell her what is actually happening, or use some other sort of altruistic claim of why I set that up.
Would it be too far to get her phone to be so "messed up" at home to the point she gives it to me to "fix" and I block OM number without her knowing? Feels like it may be too controlling and upset her too much...but I still pay the bills for it, and bought it. Suppose I do not have to tell her. She is the one trying to hide something from everyone.
Considering getting a security system, as I have had some things stolen out of my car. "I was told some peoples' houses have been broken into, so I am getting one for our family's safety." Simple one, couple cameras, alarms on the entries.
I can do a lot of things in the background technically, just not sure if something gets brought up, whether I should say "I did it because of this..." or just play it off with some other excuse and then a "I can look at it when I get a chance" type statement.
I have been working the rules for the most part. Pretty well detached. We were saying "I love you" for a few weeks on departures, until I realized she was hiding A again. She did ask "Why are you pulling back," to which I did not know exactly what to say. What ended up coming out was "Oh I am sorry, I did not realize I was doing that." To which she said "Come here and kiss me." So I did. I just rediscovered Friday, this was the next day. May have been a little abrupt of a change for her.
