Seperated, she is with someone - I'm desperate (2)

[vdubber]

So yesterday when I informed WAW I was aware of her surgery Friday and hoped everything went well I did not address her comment about meeting for coffee. She messaged me after work saying I guess that means you don't want to meet for coffee. I had already decided I was not willing to have anymore communication yesterday so did not respond.

I did send a message this morning indicating if she still wanted to meet for coffee this weekend that would be fine. She said don't worry about it. She then texted me a couple things she wanted me to know that she had planned on talking to me about during coffee like she is going on a trip with her dad end of April and needs me to take kids for 2 weeks, etc. She said there was more but she would try to text it to me at lunch.

So lesson learned here. I was in avoidance for fear of seeing her and what she wanted to talk about. End result is now we won't meet and I will just get whatever info through text which makes it somewhat easier not to see her but at the same time our visual contact is zero so the opportunity for me to sit and listen and show any 180s is gone. I think I've said here I am my own worst enemy. I need to stop letting fear dictate my actions.