Post retreat situation

[Card29]

Didn't realize you had this thread already, so I'll post my response to your "post retreat" thread here:

Soak up those moments when you are content. Don't chase them or try to force them to happen, but try to sink into them when they do come, savor them. You need rest, especially with a D1 by yourself. Anytime you're stressing about your sitch, you are doing the opposite of resting. I lost 15-20 pounds (starting from a healthy weight) in 2 weeks last summer. Yes, I was eating less, but I was also burning at least an extra 1,000 calories a day due to anxiety. Get as much sleep as you can (try to nap), and when you find yourself in one of those moments of calm, try to dodge any thoughts that will take you out of it.

MrBond, I'm confused about your comments about LRT earlier in this thread? Going from what DR says, as Marylov mentioned, a physical separation requires LRT. And he exhibits every other sign (not wanting to work on the R at all, etc.). Any additional thoughts?

Mary, from your other thread:

I think I am struggling right now with the fact that I really miss him as my friend. I still love him so much, and I would love to just go to dinner with him. I am hoping that after another week i can start to work on starting to rebuild at least our friendship. I keep telling myself that if I focus on reconnecting instead of reconciling, things will be easier.

Be careful trying to rebuild anything at this point, even friendship. To him, it may come off as pressuring, and could push him even further away. It also sets you up for extra, unnecessary disappointment. You know your sitch better than anyone though. Search your heart - do you really think he might want to work on your friendship right now? I know that you so badly want to connect with him, to laugh with him, talk with him. Try as best you can to make decisions from deep thought, though, not your desires, however desperate they are.

Here's to a good Thursday for you!