She doesn't trust me, doesn't want to depend on me. She says she has an easy time getting through the day because she avoids looking at photos and even thinking about the situation. She says she's not angry, forgives, and understands, yet reminders of every little thing I've ever done wrong ooze out of her like venom, even when she's calm.

"How many chances am I supposed to give you? I've given you too many already."

Words don't matter. Actions don't matter. How can I let her know that her love and kindness all these years past didn't just disappear into nothingness? How can I let her know that I do not take her and the family she has given me for granted? How can I make her believe that I will never give in to anger or complacency? What in this world can I give of myself to deserve one final chance at the life she once tried to share with me?

Me:31 W:31 D:6
T: 9/2001 M: 1/2009
W unhappy: 6/14
W moves to parents: 10/14
W wants D (angry): 12/14
W okay w/ S: 2/15
W wants D (calm): 2/15
W gets new job/place: 3/15
W admits PA, suggests MC: 8/15