Doing the limbo thing (thread #8)

[shodan]

Twin

I struggle with that. When we first started this process of healing/piecing, I was very honest with her about my needs and when I needed more from her. Unfortunately, I think it came across as needy, which I know was not doing me any good in re-attracting my W to me. Also, it was putting too much pressure on her. I realized that I need to be the source of my own happiness.

Is she meeting my needs consistently...she does very well when we are together. But, when either of us travels, she somewhat drops off of the mat. So at those times, I feel a void. But it is at those times that I reassure myself that (1) this is a long road to recovery and (2) I cannot rely on her for my happiness. I am my own person, not defined by my R with my W. I am a father, a son and a friend. I am loved by God and other around me. It is at those times that I do something for myself...talk to a friend, go to crossfit, go to yoga, go to martial arts, focus on my work, read a book, watch a movie, do something with my kids, etc.

Would I like more from my W? Yes. Has she given me more and more over the past few month? Yes, every week shows steady improvement.

I hope that helps.