V, it's true that no one can make you feel anything. But I worry about you, dear. All that protecting you are doing -- please be careful you aren't just shutting down all together. We should be able to have feelings, and express them to those we love and feel safe in doing so. If we have to constantly control our feelings, well, maybe we are hanging out with the wrong people. I think the main problem in my M was that neither H nor I ever really got the hang of expressing our feelings, hopes and dreams to each other (although he maintains it's about my (former) weight and my (formerly) messy closet). Next time around, I want someone to whom I can speak freely, and tell him what I think and feel without fear of retribution. Part of that is being able to tell him when his words have hurt me, because that person is going to love me enough to care that he hurt me. Don't you want that, V?
