Momx4, My experience might help you. I was just like your H. When my wife was expecting our children and nursing etc. I was working 'til late often then I would come home and work on the computer. We had a small house and the computer was in the bedroom. I was up until 1am most nights working on it. I did not realise it at the time but I was being totally selfish. I did no chores around the house at all. I thought I was doing the right thing and couldn't understand why W was going off me. Sex became a high pressure subject where the more I pushed her the more resistant she became until to all intents and purposes it has gone altogether. Some time ago she complained that I never do anything to help around the house and that if I did perhaps she would be more willing to ML. Well to me that was the strongest motivator I had ever been given and I started noticing piles of unwashed clothes where I had stepped over them before. I now do the washing - well I pick up clothes and put them in the machine. I also do all the washing up and I tidy things away. I organised a cleaner once a week who does all the mucky stuff and I help more with the garden (she likes gardening so we do that together). I also redecorated the house and built a conservatory with my bare hands. All on the promise of more love. That probably started as much as 10 years ago and I am still doing my share of chores. Unfortunately the love and sex I dreamed of is yet to materialise which is why I'm on this forum... SD
