I'm having trouble getting started

[Lina]

First, it's good that you're willing to try. If your husband doesn't appreciate that, then he's being quite the goober - it's the hardest step sometimes.

Second, this is a great place to come for comfort and support. So, welcome, and hopefully we can help.

Third, I'm stealing a moment away from in-law time, so I can't really respond to your whole post, but I've time for a quick little cyber-hug. *hug* (-:

And on the birth control side, have you considered the Depo Provera shot? It's once every 3 months, so it's not an addition to daily routines and is easy to manage with the doc. I'm horribly flighty, so for me it was the best option, but it's simplified pregnancy worries for both of us. It might be a good way to get rid of those worries for you without adding an additional stressor to your life and possibly (depending on what you're doing now) could take one away. (Not an all-purpose suggestion, just something you might consider.)