If we own the story then we can write the ending

[Andy125]

So today and honestly for the last couple of days I have been struggling with which way I should be taking things in respect to my marriage. I know that it has only been a week since she moved out, and that in the grand scheme of time my sitch has not been that long. As everyone has read from my posts I have certainly struggled with learning to detach, something that I almost equate to being addicted to a drug. I believe that on that front I have made some great strides, and am learning how negative an effect griping tighter and tighter was. I have also learned how sacrificing my boundaries, how the constant rolling over, never helped things in my marriage. In fact it probably helped to make things worse.

Now I hear the many of the people (my support group) screaming in my head "stop blaming myself. Stop taking all the responsibility". Don't get me wrong I'm not taking all of it, I'm just owning up to my part as a self reflection. That being said here is where my struggle is, I have had a few interactions with my W in the last 4 days. Mainly it has come as text messages, but a couple have been with her coming by the house to pick things up or drop off my D's. On Friday my W began texting me about needing some tools to hang a shelf. I tried to keep my distance by choosing not to respond right away to her messages. At one point she said "hanging shelves are not my strong suit". I think that would have been an opportunity to be a cheer leader to her and simply say "I know that you can do it" or something along those lines. I didn't I just simply left it as a basic response. Later on Sunday when she dropped the kids off she offered praise on the new chalkboard wall I had created for my D's. Again said thank you but didn't really go overboard or anything (I think at that moment I simply wanted her to drop the kids and go). My thoughts here are that right now I need to creat some distance, shes moved out, shes gone her choice. I need to focus on me and my own self worth/healing. Am I right on this line of thinking? or am I doing more damage? Honestly me detaching and not being at her beckon call is a 180 for me, and to go back to my drug analogy, its like someone "come on just a little bit, it will feel so good" I really looking for some guidance here. To answer the how am I doing question? I'm actually doing pretty good, kinda surprisingly. It [censored] and I have my moments.... but this isn't as terrible as I had thought it would be.

I'm really looking for some advice here, I don't want to make things worse from a marriage standpoint. After all the reason that I'm posting here is because I want to save my marriage, not at the expense of my own self-worth, but want to save it none the less.