Hi Shining, Nice to hear from you. I'm just waiting on my court date to finalize the D. W was in such a huge hurry to get together with the lawyers and "finalize" things and have papers drawn up but now things have slowed down. Funny she hasn't seen her father since that day but went this weekend so I expect I will get a call from L soon now. The only time she gets in a hurry is when he is around pushing her to move. I have kept things civil between us and haven't given W a chance to spew her "reasons" for destroying our family. It has changed so many times just like your H it just doesn't matter what this months reason may be.
Like you I have no desire for an R right now. My D's actually have expressed to me that I should with my D15 saying I deserve someone who "cares about you not treat you the way mom did". I just smile and say not now. I wonder if your step son knows H is using him and your R as an excuse for his actions? One of W's reasons was I was "too hard" on my oldest D in the past and when my D19 heard her mom say this she got angry saying I was never too hard on her and was a great dad. Funny how only her and her father think that but to W it must be true.
I know the day the D is final will be sad and will hurt. Anyone who doesn't feel that way after 21 years of M and 26 years together has problems that go much deeper than their M. It's natural to feel this way, just don't let it hold you back from moving forward with your new life. It may not be the life you thought you would have but you still get to choose what it will be like. You've got THAT going for you!
