Most of the messes in my life, especially financial, are self-imposed.

A big part of this move to N.Y. was about embracing what I deserve in life...just like everyone else.

But, something in me feels at home when I'm under fire.

When Wonka and Job were calling me on the carpet for my performance at work...I was horrified and satisfied at the same time. I could hear my dad saying--"See, I told you she couldn't pull this off"...that's what he said before I moved. I could hear Smokey and my mother saying, "See...told ya."

I feel this internal struggle between being what I see for myself and what I've always been told I was...or maybe what I wrongly imagined people were saying? IDK.

I do know there's a very small child who cries for her mother every night when I fall asleep. I hear her crying and looking for the safest place to run to. Sometimes, actually most nights, I hear her saying, "I'm going to run really fast and hard away from here."

"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson