Hi Gogofo, thanks for stopping by my thread. I've been catching up on yours a bit.
Sounds like you've been through it with the piecing. Wow, what a journey. Your poor hearts have been through it.
Something occurred to me for whatever it may be worth in the future - the dates your W said you tried - my H believed the important things to our R are little, consistent, foundational. He's right but I'd say he never 'tries' either in the big romantic, sweep me off my feet sense. If you heard of Love languages, this can be very powerful for some of us. I planned a birthday weekend for my H years ago where I flew him back home (cleared day off with his employer, bought tickets, alerted friends so they could get a party going) all without him knowing until we got to airport. That's the kind of thoughtfulness that makes a lot of us feel worthy. I get aggravated sometimes that he would 'phone it in' and not put more effort into special days for me. His low key-ness is gorgeous in most senses except this one, for me. Worthiness shouldn't be attached to this stuff, but we can't help what we prefer. Idk if this helps explain 'trying' in another light that may be useful to you?
Q: did you ever work with a MC in the past as you were piecing?
Mid 30's Psych-abusive M with violent tantrums from XH D 9/15; NC forever on
