job, you and me both could give 'em a good throttling! And thanks, job, your post helped me through the game. I just remembered that it was a childish tantrum trying to get attention. Not gon' do it!
I can tell that dealings with him are going to be something I really have to prepare myself for.
Right now, my life is like a minute-to-minute basis. I can't handle anything more. It sounds ridiculous. But, honestly, I have to do this right. I don't want to make rash decisions, skip anything, and make sure I can really be strong.
I am starting to work more on wisdom vs emotion right now. But, the emotion is still there. I am home now, between games. But, my heart is still fluttering, I am still shaky, and even my legs feel jittery. Why the heck is that? Why do I feel this so strongly in every part of my body?
Xh stayed and took d14 to get a treat after the game. I couldn't believe that I walked out to my car in the HUGE parking lot, and xh parked right behind me. Like 2 feet from my car. Seriously?
Then he dropped d14 off and headed right back to hww's. That's ok. I'd rather have him farther away. But I just feel like he is so messed up in his head. More than ever. Does that happen? When they go back in the tunnel, do they become even more mixed up? I do think he worked on some things, and I do see some changes. The the verbal aggressiveness has seemed to tapered off. He would even get angry before mlc. It was his go to emotion. But, he doesn't show it the same. In fact, I haven't seen it from him since like July. But, now he is doing it a little differently, I suppose.
Oh well. Someone else's problem now. Especially his own. Heading back over to games in a little bit. I am actually enjoying myself there. Varsity plays tonight. D14's team won her division.
Gonna try to cool my jets. Settle my nerves. I don't think I have to deal with xh for a little while. He is supposed to take the kids tomorrow. Basketball is now over, so it will be awhile before I have to see him at another sporting event.
And, I think he has moved back in with hww. So, I won't have to worry about him being next door.
One minute at a time. I think I am pretty set for the rest of tonight. That's a relief.
