It's good to hear from you again Pam. I'm going to think about your situation for a while. It sounds really tricky and I might need an update.

My first question is why don't you trust him?

Secondly, are your feelings for your H still good and loving? Are you still attracted to him etc?

Are you trying to simply step up to the plate and "just do it" to hopefully gain the benefits that Michele talks about in SSM but are finding that the "reptillian" portion of the brain is taking over and preventing it? Is your mind ever "into it" when being touched at any point? Are you able to feel horny while alone? Do you "take care of" yourself ever (in a sexual way)? You mention the "give, give give" thing? (this is like my W) Why would you avoid "giving" to yourself?

It might simply be a case where the C might be a good approach.

Sorry for the 50 questions. I've gotten much better at my form of unlicensed-hack-psychology here. I've learned to talk a pretty good game. But from reading about your sitch a while ago, there is something making want to really stretch myself to help you out.


Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time -Steven Wright