Wife during deployment EA/PA ongoing #4

[Train]

Despite how you feel right now, this isn't urgent.

I LOL'd when I read this one line from W:
For me, this is the ultimate betrayal.

I just LOL'd again, copying and pasting that. I shouldn't have to tell you why I LOL'd. The "ultimate" betrayal, my big ol' white butt ...

Rysin, I haven't had much sleep the past few nights, so I'm not comfortable writing too much to you because it might not be coherent (or wise). I'll also be hit-or-miss tomorrow, but with what's going on in your sitch, I'll be proactive about checking for any updates from you.

Meanwhile, I want you to understand something: you can't fix your M in a day. But you can sure as hell destroy it in one.

SIT STILL RIGHT NOW. If you respond to your W in ANY way - and I'm not convinced you SHOULD until you've regained your center - then respond the way Starsky pitched. No more. No less.

I know you won't understand it when I say this to you, but I'm actually glad your sitch has hit this point. It's better than the limbo you've been in. Your W just fired a shot, and it gives you an opportunity to truly rise and shine. You can handle this like you did the other day (getting sucked into a R talk and falling for W's bullsh!t, hook, line and sinker, which gave/gives her MORE power). Or you can learn from your mistake - which you assured us you did a day or two ago - and kick back and let W twist in the wind while you stay true to your course.

W asked you to handle things like a man. So handle them like a man. Respond the way Starsky proposed, or don't respond at all.

Let her throw her little temper tantrum. Don't anguish over it. Instead, transfer that anguish back on the person who DESERVES it: her.

Let.her.spew. And let her CHOKE on it. Period.