Susana (4) - Do you have to be confusin'?

[Wonka]

Susana,

Don't read too much into H's pullback. He's probably feeling somewhat flummoxed himself with last night's flirtation and teensy bit vulnerable there.

I have an idea for this weekend. Why don't you make it an adventure with H? How about a Three Stooges marathon with his favorite snacks and drinks? Or do Godfather marathon. I'd go with Three Stooges because laughter releases good-feelings and you will bond over watching their films.

Remember...light & breezy.

I love playing Scrabble board games....you?

[gogofo]

He did all the dishes and cleaned the kitchen but insisted I not help him and I go read. Not sure what that was about because I wanted to help. I think AoS may be his LL but he won't really ever let me do AoS.

When I do things like this and tell my W that I don't want help and to go do something fun it is because it is a loving action from me. To me it is a feeling that I would rather spend my time doing a chore and helping out so my W could have time doing something that she would like.

Not sure if that is what he is feeling, but that is what I feel when I do the similar things.

[gogofo]

I have an idea for this weekend. Why don't you make it an adventure with H? How about a Three Stooges marathon with his favorite snacks and drinks?

I like this ^^^.

Maybe you could also work in a suggestion about something for him to help you out. Men like to fix stuff. Something like "this dang blender is acting up, do you think you could help me with this so we can have some margaritas?"

I know it would make me feel good helping out my W. It seems to hit most men in a couple of places: being Mr. Fix-it, helping our "helpless" W, and coming to her rescue. It would be a nice ego stroke for me.

[susana4]

Susana,

Don't read too much into H's pullback. He's probably feeling somewhat flummoxed himself with last night's flirtation and teensy bit vulnerable there.

I have an idea for this weekend. Why don't you make it an adventure with H? How about a Three Stooges marathon with his favorite snacks and drinks? Or do Godfather marathon. I'd go with Three Stooges because laughter releases good-feelings and you will bond over watching their films.

Remember...light & breezy.

I love playing Scrabble board games....you?

I like this. H loves my cooking more than anything so I'm sure he'd be really excited if I did snacks and drinks.

My only concern is, can I suggest this without it coming across as too much pursuit especially if he's in a period of pullback? (Am I interrupting his man cave time?) also I wasn't going to invite him to anything else and wait and see if he'd invite me, not sure if this counts.

But I do really like the sound of it, it sounds really fun! I bet H would love it too. You're right I think he may be a bit flummoxed by the flirtation. Just don't want to scare the deer...

So what about..."H, since you don't have cash to go out this weekend I was thinking what if we did a fun day in on Saturday? Movie marathon and snacks and drinks?"

Men out there - when you are in cave mode, would this work or would it be too much?

[susana4]

He did all the dishes and cleaned the kitchen but insisted I not help him and I go read. Not sure what that was about because I wanted to help. I think AoS may be his LL but he won't really ever let me do AoS.

When I do things like this and tell my W that I don't want help and to go do something fun it is because it is a loving action from me. To me it is a feeling that I would rather spend my time doing a chore and helping out so my W could have time doing something that she would like.

Not sure if that is what he is feeling, but that is what I feel when I do the similar things.

Thanks Gogofo. It's nice to have that insight.

Is AoS one of your LL?

Thanks too for the suggestion on fixing something!
He's actually been saying he was going to fix the kitchen cabinets but hasn't yet, I wasn't going to bring it up though because I was worried it might come across as nagging.

Any suggestions on phrasing to make it seem not like nagging?

[Starsky309]

What's the best way to deal with it?

Think of him as a bee. As in "LEAVE HIM BE."

[Wonka]

Susana,

So what about..."H, since you don't have cash to go out this weekend I was thinking what if we did a fun day in on Saturday? Movie marathon and snacks and drinks?"

Try not to say "we" when broaching the subject. Just simply ask this sometime tomorrow:

"Hey, I was thinking about your comment that you want to stay in Saturday. Here's an idea: How do you feel about having a Three Stooges marathon in front of the TV? I'd be happy to gather up some snacks and drinks for you. What do you think? Any other ideas?"

You want it to make it all about HIM. Not "we", "us" or "together"...etc. Make sense? If H invites you to join him, then by all means go for it.

You don't want to hoover over him too much. In fact, I'd make a mani/pedi appt during the same day if I were you.

[susana4]

What's the best way to deal with it?

Think of him as a bee. As in "LEAVE HIM BE."

Got it. I have perfected the art of ignoring tonight. Spent the evening reading on my end of the sofa.

"What, is that a man over there? I thought it was a lump of coal"

[Starsky309]

LOL!

[susana4]

Susana,

So what about..."H, since you don't have cash to go out this weekend I was thinking what if we did a fun day in on Saturday? Movie marathon and snacks and drinks?"

Try not to say "we" when broaching the subject. Just simply ask this sometime tomorrow:

"Hey, I was thinking about your comment that you want to stay in Saturday. Here's an idea: How do you feel about having a Three Stooges marathon in front of the TV? I'd be happy to gather up some snacks and drinks for you. What do you think? Any other ideas?"

You want it to make it all about HIM. Not "we", "us" or "together"...etc. Make sense? If H invites you to join him, then by all means go for it.

You don't want to hoover over him too much. In fact, I'd make a mani/pedi appt during the same day if I were you.

Thanks Wonka, that makes sense! No "we". That's good-no pressure and up to him to invite me if he wants. And if he doesn't, well, I'll keep up my PMA.

I will probably go to belly dancing class that day, and maybe ill schedule a mani-pedi for after.

Thanks!