You know, Mighty, this is a sad thing. It is. The whole last year was a whirlwind for you. Then he tried to succk you back in. It's an awful lot.
You feel how you do. So, mourn the end of your marriage because I dont think you've done that yet. Not really.
There isnt anything at all wrong with feeling sad about it. You just dont want to live in sad.
The thing about that relationship is that it involves two very broken people. And because it does, it really isnt about him rejecting you. It's about him not liking himself. It's about him being in crisis. And she certainly has her own issues.
Hard as it is to get your mind around, it doesnt really have anything to do with you. You did not imagine your marriage and your love for each other. It was there. It was real.
Somewhere along the way, issues that he didnt resolve in his life, caught up with him. This crisis was destined to happen. You could have been perfect. Really. No amount of loving him could have stopped it.
The thing about feeling rejected is that it stands in the way of what needs to get in. That is acceptance and forgiveness. You arent ready for that yet..the forgiveness part, but, it is a necessary part of this process.
He is really and truly fractured, M, trying to find what will make him happy. He thinks a new baby can. The thing is he wont find it until or unless he looks within.
I think he wanted it all. His kids, her, you, the baby. He is all over the place.
It's best for you to get out of the way of all of that. Way out of the way.
I know you are scared, and sad and angry and confused. Who wouldnt be with how he has acted?
So, it is best to just get back on your path. Leave him to his crazy. Take care of you and the kids.
He is going to show anger. He is going to try to get to you. It's what they do...like children.
Let him blow in the wind, M. He isnt worthy of you.
