I have read some experts that say in many marriages, it's not the frequency that is the problem, but who initiates it. Initiating sex SHOWS that you are desired. My wife has not initiated sex in 8 years. If I have to initiate the sex, I will hardly even give her credit for having sex. In terms of the love bank concept, I would say that if my wife initiates sex, she gets a +10. If I initate sex and she allows it, I give her a +1, if I am rejected, give her a -3. So the only real way for my wife to actually get positive units for the love bank is for her to initate. Remember, this is not about sex, this is about "Complete Sexual Fullfillment". The "DESIRE" of the wife is FAR more valuable to me then the actual act of sex.
