Yes. I have read the Divorce Remedy. I am reading it again and several others about learning to love someone. I do understand what you are saying. I guess I figured my feelings are important in this marriage also.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
You may be on moderation now, post in small frequent replies and stay on this thread until you reach 100 posts (for your thread, you can also post on other peoples threads to give support). Especially on this Newcomers forum, where the posting activity is very active, and your posts can quickly fall to the bottom of the page or even several pages down. Keep journaling and asking questions - people will come! Most important - POST!
Get out and Get a Life (GAL). DETACH.
Believe none of what he or she says and half of what he/she does.
Have NO EXPECTATIONS.
Take care of yourself, breathe, eat, sleep, exercise.
Take the parts of this advice that you need and don't worry if I have repeated something that you have already done.
Here are a few links to threads that will help you immensely:
So I guess I am just a selfish jerk! Too bad I did not write about all the nice things I have done for my wife out of LOVE. Not because I wanted anything or for any other reason. Like how I always took care of her when she was sick. And that is alot. She has health problems. I have given her massages, rubbed her back. Cooked for her. Took care of the kids. Raised her kids from her previous marriage. That was no picnic. But I loved them as my own and cared for them. Stood by her side through both our kids pregnancies. With her health issues, it was making trips to the hospital at the drop of a hat. Bringing her flowers just because. Sending her emails during the day to check on her. I could keep going, but I won't. I am not keeping score. I just wanted to be clear that I have not been selfish about everything. But I have seen how I can be selfish and controlling.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
I'm sorry. I am just really struggling some days with all this. I feel like a failure sometimes when I see how happy other couples are. Even some that I know really how the husbands are.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
That whole post that you just wrote was all scorekeeping. Period. I'm sure if we were to ask her, she can also come up with a long laundry list of things that she does and has sacrificed for you.
Difference is that she wants out and you don't.
What was the boundary that she crossed during Valentine's Day?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
She works nights talking to men on the phone for money. If you get what I mean. She doesn't just do that. She also dispatches. But she took a call that was not appropriate at all. To her it is just a job. But as long as we have been together she sometimes doesn't think about things. I know she wants to make money bad, but she would have never done that in the past.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
Thank you for helping me. I need alot of help. I have been struggling with this stuff for the past few months. It is hard when there is no one to talk to. Any other suggestions, I am all ears!! We did have a good talk at lunch today.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
