If we own the story then we can write the ending

[Andy125]

I feel the need to post... honestly I'm not too sure what I'm going to say so I will let it flow and see where it takes me. Well I've now made it through day 1 and 2. Day 2 came a little easier, unfortunately it was met pretty early with a challenge. The new arrangement is that my W comes to the house to pick the kids up and take them to school 2 days a week. That is what happened yesterday, but she showed up early and then proceeded to head downstairs to grab things she had left behind. I know what you are all screaming right now... boundaries BOUNDARIES!! I was whole heartedly not prepared to face that, I should have had a plan in place, and if it had been any other day (not day 2) I would have had the kids all ready to go. But I didn't I was struggling to make the morning routine... well routine and I was behind. She took the opportunity and exploited it, to include then walking to our bedroom to get a jewelry box she left. Fortunately I had recovered enough to stop the invasion of my ( and the kids space). I was able to assert myself enough to make it clear that wasn't ok.

The night before ( a little after I made the post on Mon) my W finally texted me and asked if it would be ok if she called and talked to the girls. I said absolutely and she also figured out how to set up FaceTime so the kids could actually see her. I think being able to FaceTime her really helped them. She also asked if she could have my help picking up some mattress for the kids bed at her place, I had offered to do that for her on the weekend. I agreed, but only on a time frame that worked for me. So yesterday I met up with her at the store and loaded two mattress into my car. Again I personally feel this falls into the DB mindset. I am the husband that she would be a fool to leave (she just can't see that yet) and want to see my kids feel comfortable at her place. She thanked me a number of times for helping, as she had on the weekend when I helped her move. The rest of the day proceeded without incident and I met them at Hockey, then the kids and I went home. She didn't stay for D9 practice. Unfortunately the whole situation caught up with D5 last night. She was really having trouble falling asleep and as I lay with her, she began to cry. She said it had been along time since we had talked to them (its was back at the end of Oct that we told the kids we were getting divorced) and said that you and Momma used to be best friends. That was pretty hard to hear, and all I could do was tell her it was ok to cry.

I am nervous about how tonight is going to go... they have their first overnights with the W tonight. I'm concerned for how my D's are going to do... but I'm also worried about how I'm going to do. Especially tonight... I have tried my best to plan things out so that I just keep busy. I did however read a great article that talked about being present with the pain of loss. To look at the things that hurt to accept the pain, and really just feel it. I'm not sure if that is what I am going to do, I think in a way that is what I did on 1 and 2 just stayed present with it. I guess we will see. Thank you so very much for the hugs, kind words, and reading. If I can inspire or give comfort to one person that they aren't alone then its worth posting. As always my hope is that one day I can be standing here talking about my success story and how I Busted my Divorce.