This can't be the end! #2

[theoden]

Barry,

Here are some 2 X 4's across the head for you.

1. You are dragging your kids into this. Making your son lie to you wife while you snoop on the home computer and spy in her bedroom? Come on dude. Asking your kids to live with you? You shouldn't of moved out in the first place. Your wife started this mess, you walked out of the family home and now you want your kids to scramble and make up for YOUR absence. Your wife should have moved out and then her actions would have spoken for themselves. No you are trying to turn your kids against your wife for YOU moving out? Please stop this.

2. If you keep falling apart like this emotionally, your kids will want to live with your wife, who SEEMINGLY is acting like the stronger, clearer, self-confident, parent.

3. You have given ALL the power to your wife by begging, pleading and humiliating yourself in trying to get her back into the marriage. You are not very attractive right now. STOP pursuing her. It's pathetic and turning her off.

4. By chasing your wife you are not giving her the opportunity to miss you or conceive of a life without you. She wants her space right now, give it to her. By constantly trying to pull her back into the marriage, she is only going to feel smothered and will want to pull away more.

5. You wife is going to cheat on you, if not tomorrow, but very soon. Accept that fact. Her desire to look better and go out at night and take salacious selfies means she's going to want male attention. She'll get it, and she will have sex with someone else. You keep talking like that's the point of no return where you will really start to man up.(I won't pay the mortgage for her to shag someone use our house as her love-den) Start manning up now. She's going to cheat. It's almost a given.


7. It's never too late. Marriages recover after worse things. However, you current path of behavior is almost a guarantee for failure.

Now, some encouragement:

1. I've been there, too and made virtually all the same mistakes.

2. You do have the moral high ground.

3. You are a great guy. Go find that guy. Find your warrior self.

4. The more you focus on enjoying your own life (however impossible that sounds), the easier this will get, regardless of the outcome.

5. It's almost impossible not to want a certain outcome and be obsessed by your wife's every move and action.

--Theoden