Seperated, she is with someone - I'm desperate (2)

[vdubber]

Thanks Toots. You are right I have no control and need to accept where I am, how things are, and continue to focus on what I can control which is me and my response to my situation and day to day life.

It's hard to assess my progress or lack of it some days as I tend to let the negative things overshadow the good. I do get sad...i do get angry...I do cry. But I also have been thinking more positively about the man I am and I have been keeping W out of my mind much more than when I first joined this forum. I understand it's baby steps but I must keep moving forward.

So today, my D22 called me to tell me she loves me and wants to come see me tonight. She has been very angry with her mom for quite some time now based on the actions she sees from her mom. I always just tell her I love her mom and she needs to have a relationship with her and appreciate the time they have to spend together.

She said she and her grandma (Ws mom) have been talking about an intervention for W around her drinking problems. I told her i cannot participate in that and whatever she does or doesn't do is up to them and she needs to be prepared if they pursue it that it may not go over well. I tell her any other talk of her mom is probably best to not have with me as I am too close to the situation and her relationship with me and her relationship with her mom need to be seperate.

It's tough as I want her to know I understand why she has anger but have told her we are where we are due to both of us. She is very worried about her mom as is her grandma and they want her to understand she has an addiction. I am staying out of it as although I do think she needs to hear it from the people that love her, it's not my place to get involved this point.

I am going to dinner tonight with D22 but she assured me it would just be discussion about us and i will make sure it is. I'm very much looking forward to seeing her and hearing about her life. We have a great bond and it frustrates her that I always speak highly of her mom around her and always encourage her to build that relationship up.

I have decided to not respond at this time to W request to meet and talk. If she presses I will tell her in a couple weeks time maybe we can meet. I need some more time for me and things have been too emotional on both sides for a face to face now. Hoping some time will help both sides settle and have a more productive conversation.

So dinner tonight with D22 and i have a family (my side) get together this Friday night so will work on making GAL plans for Wed/Thur if possible. Btw have been listening to inspirational audio cds on way to and from work. They do help...now if I could just not let triggers bring me down I would be better off. One of my goals for this week.