Take a deep breath...
You need to take your focus off of her. Just like you didn't "force" her to have an affair she doesn't "force" you to loose your temper and accuse her of things.

If she wants to poke then walk away. DB'ing is about you. What are YOU doing to become a better person? What can you do today to take a step towards one of your goals?

Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction