It's good to have a project, focusing on the kitchen may be that. But please call in all the help you can. How is your 17 year old with tools? Maybe this is a good opportunity for him to learn some construction skills.
What do you have to do in there? I put a new kitchen in my mom's house once, with my ex - flat pack cabinets that we assembled ourselves (I'm pretty good at assembling and they were really pretty nice, held up well). Formica countertop which actually looked great (the most inexpensive option, although I like tile work and if I was doing a kitchen for myself, might do tiles - my current kitchen has big marble tiles and that looks good. Loved my old granite but that's expensive and NOT something you can do yourself, although I once saw a mosaic countertop made from leftover bits of granite). My mom's kitchen also had a floating laminate floor. We had someone install it but looks easy enough to do yourself.
Be careful when planning your cabinets, that doors don't bump into each other or into appliances etc.
Maybe you can guilt your ex into paying for some of the work??? I know you're used to being tough and self-sufficient, but maybe this is a good time to play the "poor me" card and get some money out of him at least.lol.
and they were really pretty nice, held up well). Formica countertop which actually looked great (the most inexpensive option, although I like tile work and if I was doing a kitchen for myself, might do tiles - my current kitchen has big marble tiles and that looks good. Loved my old granite but that's expensive and NOT something you can do yourself, although I once saw a mosaic countertop made from leftover bits of granite).