Part 13 - contents (un)lucky for some

[jim0987]

Hi edz,


sounds very interesting indeed. I can see why it would also be really confusing. Its certainly going to test your detachment, it might be worth having a plan for tomorrow to help avoid any slump.

With the card and restating it isn't what you want I think toots is right and you need to make sure you give her plenty of space.

Glad youve had a positive weekend (except for the fish).

You need to finish the season you're on as the new one starts on Tuesday.

[Vanilla]

Take your time. Catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

Drinking a glass of wine myself and watching Ted.

Easy tiger..........

By the way a new documentary on big cats coming soon, taken 10 years in the making. Just for BFT.

My little black cat was riveted by the wildlife programs on the TV.

[edz]

Hi guys

Tiger, haven't been called that in a while v!

Bft is presently snoring on my foot. She has had some fun lately if I queue up mouse videos on youtube on my tablet lots of big eyes and ear twitching!

Oddly no slump tonight as such, I'm lonely but nothing new there, theres a difference between that and the need I had before which is much less these days.

Miss s tonight but that's more because hes so great, I know w was missing him today, glad she's talked to me today and so glad she's talked to me about this. May not have been r talk as such at least what lbs wants to talk about but its talk, change, regardless its got to be a good thing rather than limbo.

Anyway I'll be checking in guys got some daft new things I may try this week just for the change, money has to work out though my next big challenge..

Oh Jim you're assuming I'm watching uk pace

Onto us house of cards now

[Sotto]

So, don't keep us in suspense Edz....what daft new things might you try this week??!

[edz]

Morning

Nope, will tease you all with those need to get some money issues sorted first and working today along with drains people coming. All connected to swimming and pma I'll leave that thread hanging there.

Sounds like we have similar weather to you today Toots grey, grey, grey and raining in spurts - urgh

So fell sleep watching house of cards last night really enjoying that, was split as I loved the original UK version and wasnt keen on a US remake but its Kevin Spacey so gave it a go, up to about the 4th episode (fell alseep at this point) really great.

This morning I paid for the late night though groggy with the alarm doesnt cover it, still will get a break and make coffee soon.

Otherwise got to go up to the pet store at lunch time, aforementioned drains (fish and these arent connected) and making a curry with chicken and the leftover veg and pork from yesterday tonight.

Add in some more House of Cards thats the current plan!

Nothing from w since last night, suppose I'll now get the flipside of all the conversation from yesterday with little contact, will just need to suck it up for now. It did feel very cathartic yesterday having that call, I do feel after thinking (not obsessing) it over that the whole issue of s not being about all the time is now biting at her, as you said toots her not having the opportunity to be around s every day is a consequence of leaving, while we stay as we are she wont see him mostly at weekends (as she wants to h.e. in the week) if we move to divorce it will mean doing what a few divorced h.e. people I've looked into do, on "holidays" s could come to me and I'd book leave as well as me having him for some education trips, maybe swimming and exercise as well as the odd week where I book some time and we do his teaching.

I dont think w is ready to not see s for 7 days or so though. We touched upon this yesterday without specifics (I was also keen she direct the conversation as much as possible rather than me push) and yes, if we reconciled we would all be together even if w or i took s out "for the day" etc he would be coming back. However we didnt dwell on that and I need w to commit to any reconciliation being for both of us not *just* to resolve being around s.

Anyway she's not at a decision yet, Im not sure when or if she'll get there. My point to her yesterday was to reaffirm my position, I dont want to d, that s and I have and re rebuilding and that I just want her to decide what she needs to do. If it involves reconciliation I'll be there 100% but we both need to want to do that for it to work.

[Vanilla]

Edz

Just let W observe your behaviour with S.

Edz, you draw this to her attention and this is unnecessary, it is almost as if you think it might be reversible. And it isn't, Edz act as if W can see all your actions with S and relax about this.

You can cease reminding W that you are a great dad, because you are.

V

[edz]

Thanks V kind of you to say.

Yes its not very clear in that now i read it back (tablet typing in a rush) w brought it up not me, try not to shout about my 180s or they are more showing off than demonstrations.

She brought it up by saying her primary issue was s being happy and he clearly is with me, that she honestly thinks given half a chance he'd move in.

I then said we'd worked hard and will continue on our relationship but nothing else really. Tricky to get down in a posting as it was a very "wriggly" conversation between our r, s her work and everything else going on!

[Vanilla]

Your W knows, it is a change!

She appeared to have wanted the change, and her behaviour indicates this.

W will adapt to this change: excuse the pun but it is a game changer.

So was not mentioned, apologise did not understand this. low key though so as to ease even more transitions. Edz, drop the prejudging about 7 days, just carry on as your changes are working for you.

V

[edz]

So Just had a quick personal time travel through my posts, thought i'd put this here for reference

Part 1 - WAW - One month in but looking for coping advice
Part 2 - Edz - continuing to move forward
Part 3 - Edz - Tough Times ahead proceeding with caution
Part 4 - Moving Out but moving on?
Part 5 - New Place - New Togs - New Me? Mmmm (Part 5)
Part 6 - Caution contents under repair (part 6)
Part 7 - Caution contents may be under pressure (part 7)
Part 8 - Contents may have settled in transit
Part 9 - Contents May Become Mildly Amusing
Part 10 - Contents may prove volatile
Part 11 - contents may be different than (this was supposed to end .. as advertised)
Part 12 - Contents may vary
Part 13 - contents (un)lucky for some

A lot has happened in this time, wonder what will happen next?

[edz]

Hi V

yes you're right I dont want w deciding what i would or wouldnt do now, best I dont do it either. I'll concentrate on working on me and how I work and relate to others.

Thanks for the fuzzy velvet cushioned 2x4