Complex #4 - D talk started / Detaching continues

[Complex]

Thanks for the psychological breakdown. This is very important to understand IMO because we husbands are not capable of making these connections.

I agree OM for sure is insecure. I remember him asking her in a text if we still live together, like 2-3 months ago. She calls me roommate in their texts. But she tried to 'convince' him that it's over and it's ok to go with these feelings.
"Wanting to be my 'friend' comes with responsibilities" W told him and "we all make mistakes, so we are allowed to start all over, right?". He didn't really react but W also was like "it's going to be a friendly divorce, the most amicable of all" and he was like "they don't exist in my book".
Contact between them wasn't like crazy, but crossed the line big time.
But the worst for me was when she told her friend "I have to tell him
H found out, I want to do this right, my heart is in knots, I hope I dong lose him over this"..and friend just like "aw I'm so proud of you". As hurtful as it gets.

W and OM don't just only have few weeks together. They are long time work friends. Which for W is a much better R foundation than ours...

Ya I don't think she told family yet, but my mom is about to. Not sure if I can or want to stop her. No idea if there's any benefit tho. Right now W is patiently sitting out the renewal of my Greencard before she will make the next move. But I will wait sending it until couple weeks bf the deadline or so. Everything that buys me time is welcome right now.
But I mean what should I do right now other than keep detaching and get my own life on track if anything at all?? Guess it's ok to put this stress into W and OM relationship by stretching things? I'm getting better for sure and some changes are showing but it'll take a lot more time until I'm the person I really want to be.
If that will then include W I'm not so sure about anymore, that's up to her. But the time WILL come after I got my greencard when she's going to the next step. I know it. Nothing I can do/work towards that day is there? We are talking about 2 months..