May life be;

[Vanilla]

How do you guys feel about friends that might have been complicit when the a started?

Yes someone's who have been close to me.
Would you pull back from said person? Or persons?

Yes, it could be innocent, but I doubt it.
Given some things that have been said, I think person knows far more than they are letting on. Stuff that I have never said, directly about my r, but it was h script.

Pretty much I have a very bad feeling, just unease, with no concrete proof.

That depends Gg.

I am not sure if I would say anything as a friend as I am unsure it may not be my place, however if it was public display then I might suggest as in 'saw your H with X last week, might be nothing and felt I needed to say.'

If it was my Bestie then I would be marching up to H and X and say "hello, surprised to see you here, spoke to W today and she did not mention you were coming. Is she here tonight? Sorry I did not catch your name? I am V by the way, w bestie/close friend. How do you know H. Really?" Then I would be on the phone to Bestie.

Otherwise if it were rumours then I would be saying to Bestie H, 'I am hearing rumours about xxxx? So?" "I will be asking you if it has stopped next week" then "so it has not stopped are you telling Bestie or am I?, (crud face)"

I have done that before. I warned one close friend that I felt her H was getting too tight with another friend. Got my head bitten off, was proved right and accepted an apology. But would be more inclined to tackle the H. Only if I were there and saw it or it was my Bestie's H when I would mention X on home territory.

If this friend is worth anything to you, then ask. "Were you aware of H A? ...." And see what is said. If the response was, I was not sure, or really did not approve but did not want to hurt you or told someone this once and got a mouthful, decided never again or ' felt guilty at not telling you, but did know what to say'

Much different to ' you old hag, you deserved it, I felt sorry for him, wished it was me he as having an A with, oh thought you knew he had sex with all the women's lacross team as well, my H saw your H regularly at Strip Galore and on Tarts Corner, hated you for years, yes you were absent from the wife swap night......

Complicit? A different issue, be sure so then really cut contact on that 'friend'.

V