Utterly Gutted Part 2

[Frank75]

I think it is more complicated than just having a negative attitude. The negative thinking comes from being so depressed.

Yeah, i guess i wasn't clear. The depression causes some people to not see things clearly. Like she might in her mind really see me as some monster when in reality i might not be. But that's her brain's way of dealing with the depression.

She's very defensive about it, and at this point in time I have no idea how to even bring it up without her trying to think i'm blaming our entire situation on depression.

Definitely avoid anything that hints of blaming the situation on depression, it won't help you and it won't help her either. Separate the situation and the depression in your mind. Do you think she might be at risk of harming herself? If so, then you need to figure out a way to get help.

If not, then you might be able to figure out a way to get her to seek treatment but it sounds like it would be hard if she's defensive. And it's hard to do this without coming across as pushing. Speak to your doctor or have a look around online for how to address this.

Good idea, I haven't brought up anything to her yet. I have a doctor's appointment on friday so i'm going to ask the doctor for opinions on what to do.

Yesterday she was in bed until like 1pm, then got up and went to work and "tried" to quit again. This is like the 10th time she's tried to quit this job but they guilt her into staying. The similarities between this job and our marriage is what's getting me. Like she can't quit her job so she's redirecting this stress onto us and quitting me instead. That's my armchair psychologist opinion anyway