Still trying to make sense of last night. Cleaned the house(medium size 180 for me) W home late surprised at clean house(we had txt about her having a bad day I thought I'd do something nice indirectly), dinner made Taco Tuesday!, kids bathed, all is good. Start talking after we put kids to bed about son, trouble at school again. She takes conversation to R talk. An entire range of emotions and discussion. W says "I need space and time", "I'm not leaving kids", "I need to find myself", "I lost myself", "ILYBNILWY", "I found out difference between D and S"( She has said she might want S instead of D, I asked her if she knew the difference she did not until she looked it up, "can we split weekends where I leave then you leave?"(we are in same house, she is in spare BR, I told her previously and again that if she wants to leave that's up to her). I really think she's so confused and has no idea what she wants.I question if she's having a MLC?? She just knows she's not happy with me or where her life is right now for some reason(I know why she's mad at me). I guess that's the best it's going to be for right now. So confused, hurt, angry, and just floating through this pain.
In the mean time, I am continuing to work on me, GAL'ng(going out Friday night, friends Bday), running, making goals and plans no matter what. And doing everything I can to be cool, calm and loving to my kids. My son, ugggg... he has to know something is up, he's acting out, getting in trouble. Last night, after she came home he was happy to have made her happy by cleaning the house, he asked for a group hug, and said "when are we going to get a family picture?" I almost lost it, got choked up but kept it cool. She just grinned at me. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!
Me 41 Wife 38 T20 M13 S8 D3 Bomb 1/26/15 A confirmed 2/19/15
