W still having PA with OP

[4mendmj]

To your idea about coming home late, I like the message that our home is not a hotel but as she is co-owner of the home she has already told me (and she is correct by law) that she can come and go as she pleases and if I tell her what to do, I am controlling.
Starsky, I am not trying to refute what you say sir. I mean that. Truly. I have already gone down these roads before and screwed them up. W would say she is going to workout class and see you after workout and then not come home until midnight or later. I told her I didn't appreciate that she couldn't communicate her actual intentions or if she was going to be late to let me know so I didn't worry about her. She told me I was controlling. Everything masterfully gets thrown in my face and I have no clue what the "proper" retort is to something like that. She has already admitted she is in a PA with the OW and so I simply cannot wrap my brain around what action I have left. The therapy idea I already did and she started going to her own solo sessions a month ago but I recently learned that in her sessions (same office as my therapist and they have permission to share some information) that W does not even talk about OW in the sessions. No convo about OW at all. It is all about whether she will or will not leave and if she leaves where she will live and how hurt she is that I told both sets of parents etc.

I read in DR, find a way you have not previously communicated and try that method. Heck, I have written letters, sent emails, texted, called, face to face till I am probably blue in the face.

The last-last resort idea I read about where you say you love them enough to let them go and then go silent is something I considered but since she lives in the home and we barely speak as it is right now, it feels like we are already at that stage minus the goodbye part so no loss to her there.