NickiT...wise words. That is the exact pattern of the ow...problem is w believes every word she hears from ow and I haven't been able to break the cycle. Last night/this morning were as hard is it has been in recent time. Last night was parent teacher conferences. W wore her ring to work yesterday as it was her first day back to work but took it off again last evening to be with ow before we went to conferences. Hard to see it came off sooooo easily. W left straight from conferences to be with ow while d and I went home to get her ready for bed. W did not get home till after 11pm. Weirder yet. W woke up early again for work this morning. 30 minutes early. Said she was going to get a coffee and get an early start at work...She accidentally texted me instead of ow "on my way to pick you up " and then a few minutes later "here". I txted back huh? She responded "sorry, obviously for another person"... W has been leaving early for work to pick up ow and go to get coffees before going to work instead of spending time with d let alone helping get d ready for school. I bawled but didn't let d see me. I took d to school and then went for a swim before heading to work. Half way through the swim I started bawling again. Had to stop for a minute so I didn't drown :-)
What do I do tonight when I get home? Pretend it never happened? Bringing it up will likely start a fight. Dr says not to bring something up if it isn't going to help but ignoring it feels weird. Weird is good right? Better to be a peacemaker vs right? Or is it past that?
Bigger question...How do I set boundaries? Better question...What boundaries? All I can think of left is to file for divorce in hopes of waking her up...
Read another fifty pages of dr last night but 95% of it is for of wife wants to work on the marriage or if she wasn't having an affair. Thoughts?
Me:39 W:33 Married 6/07 D6 Found out about affair 9/14
