Is it really to late? Who knows....

[lost18]

You're right Mahhhty, thanks. I'm off the ledge for the moment after an IC appt, some crying and a reclusive day(almost didn't talk to H all day...on purpose, but decided to stop pouting). My IC says I go from A to Z...meaning wanting to save my marriage to kicking him out. My sister said that none of us (me and siblings) are very good at maneuvering the unknown, it's either black or white, unfortunately my life is very gray right now.

IC feels I need to start being more aggressive, telling him what I want instead of going to the extreme of kicking him out. I really don't know what his plan is for the weekend, he could be going to visit his friend as easily as going to meet an OW and if I declare I'm done and he really is going to visit friend than I've completely crushed any positive steps we have made in our marriage.

I know it goes against DB but I think I may need to, for my sanity if nothing else, have a conversation. Haven't decided on that yet but am thinking about it.