Utterly Gutted Part 2

[Frank75]

How are you doing Frank? When do you leave for your trip?

Hi Susana

Laying low right now. Wife is away visting a childhood friend so i'm just trying to relax. I leave next saturday for 2 weeks, i guess these pills work because i'm not stressed at all about flying. before these pills i'd be going nuts thinking about it.

That's good. Really glad to hear it! Enjoy your time relaxing, and make sure to do some stuff for yourself!

Thanks, i just relaxed and watched hockey the whole time

She came back yesterday and said hello, gave me a hug and pretty much stayed in the bedroom but didn't bring ANYTHING up about "us".

I know i'll get in trouble for bringing this up because it's about her but i'm starting to think this whole thing might be related to depression or something. I was googling depression for myself and i started finding a lot of stories very similar to my situation. I'm not saying i'm not to blame for everything, but it seems like depression is just a multiplier for bad feelings. I go back to the doctor on friday so i might ask her for some advice.

Oh and my wife has suffered with bouts of depression (untreated) since i've known her, but i never knew the full extent of it. I always just thought it was being sad/laying in bed. I never knew how bad it could be in terms of relationships.

I'm not taking any blame off of myself and i'm still working on making myself a better person. Things make a lot more sense now though how being occasionally unhappy morphed into something this big.