Thanks, Live. You know, I have been really questioning this. Like, am I in denial? Will they really be happy? What I see is clear to me.. and seemed clear to him. But, can a baby really change that? Or am I clouded? Maybe he was just saying those things... perhaps like he was saying that to her about me before.


Ick, ick, ick. I realized that I just don't want them to think they have a real family based on destroying mine. Is that horrible? I see her for who she is... he is so twisted up about her now. Because of the baby, I guess.

Will they really be happy?

Let it go. I actually do feel better. I know it doesn't seem like it, but I feel like I have SOME answers... or half an answer. And, really, the most "closure" I have ever gotten.

Dang, he looks beat down. My mom commented on how awful he looks too.

He said he is staying there bc he wants to and does not like it at bil. Which is why I had to cut him off from here a little, bc I didn't want to be used. But... it's almost like it backfired bc now he is jumping in there big time. BUT, I know that that is NOT the way to jump back in- for comfort and convenience.

Spinning, spinning, spinning. STOP! Done. Breathe.

OK, so really, back to the start. Can they really be happy? Will he see her differently bc of the baby. That stings... does take away from me... bc... baby mommma stuff... but my kids are too old to count?