Yes that and just for everything, she blames me for the escalation of the situation, even though her actions were script for wanting space and so forth. She says my actions pushed her away and into him. So just curious how long she will stay angry or maybe a time table to expect this type of treatment to continue.
It's hard to say, some women respond differently from others. For some, after the initial anger (even LIVID anger), they actually respond with respect and even attraction to the "strong stance," especially if it's maybe out-of-character for you. For others, they remain angry. Remember however, that affairs are not about YOU they are about THEIR OWN JOURNEY, and so usually the anger and loathing is SELF-loathing, merely DIRECTED at you.
Despite all the outward appearances of sunshine and lollipops and unicorns, a wayward spouse usually is NOT very happy inside. In fact, they're often miserable. More often than not, rather than do the necessary introspection, they will merely direct that at YOU.
Yes, that's what you need to do I'm just experiencing good GAL although it's forced (in Las Vegas for work). Staying busy helps sooo much, but the hard part then is to go back to where W also still lives. Makes it soooo hard for me. But when I'm gone I see the light, not sure how I can keep that when I'm around W.
And don't let W talk you down that all this is your mistake? Don't let it get to you. We all know better. Stay detached in those situations by "being the observer" not the participator. It's all script and like a movie, you just watch. Stay calm, let her vent, stay strong and don't let the emotions get to you.
Human behavior flows from three main sources: desire, emotion, and knowledge. (Plato). You have to stay on the knowledge side only
Me 32 (German) Wife 28 T 3yrs M 2yrs Moved to US for W No kids BD 6/2014 In house separation Confirmed EA 1/2015 (ongoing since BD) OM not ready Real D talk started 1/27/15
Heard from W today, nothing big she just asked me what time I would be arriving home so she could inform the house sitter. And then she asked about my family. I was short and nice. I said when iwould get home and I told her my family is good, that the funeral was tough but they are good. And I left it at that. I did not ask her anything. Was tough but I have a goal and an end result in mind.
Update- so the past few days have been ok. I did think about W but did not really dwell on anything. After she sent me a few texts "first time since separated; I might add." I have been thining about her nonstop. I know the texts were nothing important just simple como. It really got me missing her again. And now I'm sitting in Dallas airport wishing she was here. most days I still find it hard to breathe, but there are those few days where I believe there is light at the end of the tunnel. But those are far and few. Now I'm heading home to stich all over again. Time to really GAL.
Update- so the past few days have been ok. I did think about W but did not really dwell on anything. After she sent me a few texts "first time since separated; I might add." I have been thining about her nonstop. I know the texts were nothing important just simple como. It really got me missing her again. And now I'm sitting in Dallas airport wishing she was here. most days I still find it hard to breathe, but there are those few days where I believe there is light at the end of the tunnel. But those are far and few. Now I'm heading home to stich all over again. Time to really GAL.
I already told you that one of the best ways to get off a unrepentant WAS without consummating with another is to take up some partnered dancing. It feels good.
Pick your choice: 2 step, country, salsa, ballroom, etc.
Being close to a receptive person of the opposite sex feels great, you will look forward to your dance sessions and look away from the soon to be ex who doesn't want to be near you.
It really helps you to feel better without having to cheat on someone.
I'm just experiencing good GAL although it's forced (in Las Vegas for work). Staying busy helps sooo much, but the hard part then is to go back to where W also still lives. Makes it soooo hard for me. But when I'm gone I see the light, not sure how I can keep that when I'm around W.