So W sent me several texts last night saying my ignoring her was my way of trying to manipulate and control things. She was very angry. I know I need the NC right now but I do wish she wouldn't see it as me trying to play games or manipulate her or control her.
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
She also texted that she hates me and that I win she loses...idk what to make of this but she is very angry about this NC.
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
Weren't you warned this would happen? I think you will see her pull several things out of bag of tricks, before this all dies down.
Actually, she is the one who is manipulating here. IMHO, the number one manipulation women use the most is to show their man she is not happy with his actions. Apparently, from what I have seen on the board, it works fairly well.
If you give in b/c she is angry at you, then you will lose this ground you've covered during the NC.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Thank you both. I need to not let her anger bother me. I'm still reading DB and still learning. Maybe anger on her side is better than silence...it's not necessarily the emotion I'd like her to have but obviously the NC is having some affect on her. And it's definitely been good for me right now.
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
I've been doing GAL quite a bit this week...at a BBQ right now with most people I don't really know. The W's angry texts last night are still getting to me a bit. It would have been much better for me if she had never texted as I was doing good with the NC and now I'm riled up. It's hard to hear your spouse tell you they hate you. Part of my frustration is this next week being Valentines day. I wish I could fast forward to 2/15.
Ok enough pity party....back to the bbq for me.
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
Now tonight I get a text from W apologizing for her anger (her angry texts) last night. She then closes by telling me she's happier now than she has been in a long time. Another way to try and hurt me?
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
Thank you Karma. Just hurts to hear those things and she knows it. I'm going to continue NC and try to not let myself get baited into an argument with her. I guess part of her anger was that supposedly some extended family she has has been making comments and she doesn't like it. I don't know who and i haven't said anything so I feel that's on her and the reality of her actions and choices.
M: 44 W: 45 Married 26 Together 28 D: 22, S: 18, S: 9, D: 7 S: 12/2013, seperate houses OM revealed first 10/2013, stopped seeing him OM revealed 1/2015, been going on for quite some time
