Thanks everyone. The cycling is brutal. I find it so emotionally draining and truly a tragic experience. That adjective comes up again and again -- tragic.

Supposedly H is responding to separation settlement. Heard that before so we shall see. I keep crying at odd times - I am enveloped in the tragedy. Not because I am a drama queen but because from where I sit it seemed so easily avoidable. I am looking forward to a day that doesn't involve this odd feeling of tragedy.

I still pray for H every morning and every night. I can't get angry but the sadness... I am awash in sadness. When we spoke the other night he never asked about his children. It was like a knife the fact that he never thought of them. I pray for acceptance.

Every day people deal with far worse in the world. I am embearassed to think that I have had such a rough time dealing with the fact that my husband is having a MLC. That his actions are textbook and that his choice to move over a thousand miles away to be with OW is such a clique.

Sorry to whine but venting helps me slog through it. My weekend will be quiet but I think I am just trying to regroup before I start the new job full time. Being a hermit isn't bad as long as I don't make it a habit.

M:25 years at BD w/ 2 daughters
BD: 5/14
Separated 6/14 - H moved cross country w/OW
D Final 9/17

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
― Maya Angelou