Just journaling.....had a low evening last night (and thanks Edz for your kindness). For some reason, I just really missed H and wanted to get in touch with him. Much of the time now I feel pretty settled about things, at least for now. I have my plans, and they sit well with me etc.....but just these occasional lows. I suppose occasional is good though.

One thing I do find is that it is hard to think about our previous life together. Because I moved away from the area at BD, and it was all very sudden & traumatic, it is like my 'previous' life is just preserved in aspic, and in my mind I don't really know what to do with it. I don't want to dwell on it, but is it good not to think of it? IDK...

Each sitch has it's challenges. Some are living with WAS's and that is hard. I'm living with largely NC, which is peaceful, but hard in a different way. And our M didn't have a slow demise (at least not for me!) and that's something to keep coming to terms with.

Feeling more optimistic today, and I'm out tonight and pretty busy over the next few days, so that's no bad thing as I was wistful and sad last night.....I'm so grateful to everyone for their kind words and just for being here in support of each other.

Have a good day everyone...the sun is shining here! :-)

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus