I know Starsky, this is very true. It's something hard to learn. People always tend to depend their happiness on other people or circumstances.
The whole setup for me right now is just so frustrating but I think I got a good idea of what happened and what has to happen. I'm just still so in love with W.
Take this time apart to really do some introspection, and some reading on co-dependency, emotional enmeshment, and learn to grow comfortable in your own skin being alone.
Often us "Mr. Nice Guy"/pleaser/fixer/co-dependent types (and I am definitely one!) begin to conflate and confuse "love" with unhealthy "co-dependency." It's a deep topic that would take more time here than I have to give it right now, but I would urge you to really do some study and introspection on it.
LOVE is unconditional; MARRIAGE (or any other human interaction or relationship) . . . is not. At least it shouldn't be.
