Hope you are just taking a break from the board but is doing well, as you can at this point, of course.
You have a lot ahead of you. You have a lot to hope for too. This storm will pass, things will settle. It's not all done even if you decide to keep to yourself right now.
There are times where we can't see things can get better, but time is a good friend not only for you but for your H too. You both need this time.
Your H has a lot of work to do on himself and it may be his good break to find a purpose that he is looking for. Don't be all negative, after a tsunami there is always rebuilding.
Like in my sitch, I can't tell if we will ever have our Hs back, our M back, but I can't stop living and there should be another day. It's hard, but many people survived this and are happy with themselves. If it came to terms that there will be reconciliation, then fantastic.
But if its time to walk in different paths them we need to find ours. The wound will be always there, we can ignore it and have another bad R, or even worse, be bitter forever. Or we can learn and find ourselves in a better R, giving love and being loved, with more understand of how fragile a marriage can be.
Have hope, while there is life there is always something new to learn, to see, to live.
I hope you take to your heart that you will be OK, one way or the other. It is not the end of Calibri, there is always tomorrow.
