Finished my revisions to the dissolution papers. L made a bunch of sloppy errors (or perhaps her underling did). Anyway, the proposal is super generous, the parenting plan is as generous as an interstate plan can be. Hopefully it will fly, and H will agree. If not, things will get contentious. I hope his L tells him that the proposal is a great deal, and he would be crazy not to take it. I want this done yesterday.
M: 43 H: 39 D: 14 Married 15 Together 16 BD: 6/2014 S: 8/2014 OW revealed 10/2014 Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress So over it!
Ahoy- I wouldn't be at all surprised if they find something to nitpick about - but I'm keeping my fingers crossed they will agree to the big stuff. I'm glad it's moving for you.
okay, so working on dissolution paperwork with H. He is contesting the language about no overnight guests unless there is a marriage in place. I said I would consider modifying it to marriage or live-in partner, but I didn't want our daughter exposed to a rotating cast of overnight guests. the problem is his GF lives out of town and this makes it complicated for him. Like I care. I told him my only concern was our D14's comfort, and I didn't think it would be good for her to experience that. He will only have her summers and holidays -- can he really not keep it in his pants a bit and put his daughter's needs first for once? So glad to be getting this selfish narcissist out of my life once and for all. Anyone out there who can weigh in on the dissolution language about overnight guests/significant others?
M: 43 H: 39 D: 14 Married 15 Together 16 BD: 6/2014 S: 8/2014 OW revealed 10/2014 Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress So over it!
I can't weigh in, but I totally agree with you. H and I have a S agreement (not legal) that spells out the same thing. In fact, it's a lot stricter than no overnights. And although he doesn't have to abide by it because it's not legal, he is. And I'd want something in the D agreement that's similar to what you are proposing. So I'll be watching.
Back to Ahoy's question:
Originally Posted By: Ahoy
Anyone out there who can weigh in on the dissolution language about overnight guests/significant others?
Thank you for bumping me along! I could really use some advice. I'm really not trying to interfere with my H's romantic life, I just want to make sure that my daughter is not made to feel uncomfortable, and he's only put his own needs first these past 8 months, so I don't trust him to make decisions with her best interests at heart.
M: 43 H: 39 D: 14 Married 15 Together 16 BD: 6/2014 S: 8/2014 OW revealed 10/2014 Instigated dissolution 12/2014, in progress So over it!
Here's how I would look at it- at best even if he agrees, it's pretty much going to be unenforceable, right?
Maybe there is a way that you can soften the language while stil making your point - like no overnights unless they have been in a relationship for X amount of time.
I know this one is tought to swallow and I have nightmares that this is what life will be like for my girls - but I don't thinkg there is any way to make this type of promis legally binding. I think the best you can do is plant the seed that reasonable people would consider this type of behavior inappropriate.
