H's MLC #7 And the games continue

[2BHappy]

Job
Im still so hurt and angry.
I came home said hello and went to my room.
I just dont trust what I would say or how.
h invited me to go eat I declined..
they are downstairs watching tv.
i dont think im doing the right thing by avoiding thrm..but i dont want to regret what i might say.
i feel childish

You are not a horrible person, but you do need to step back and count to 10 before letting that anger loose. Your son is already hurting and he senses your moods, especially the anger. Maybe you are angry and coming across as angry at him or taking it out on him. I would sit him down and have a chat w/him. If he continues to say that you are taking it out on him, etc., then there might be a hint of truth in his comments. If your family is also telling you has you react, then it's time to change how you deal w/the anger and frustration. It's not going to be easy, but you can do it. When you feel that anger bubbling up, take a walk, find a pillow and beat it to death, but do try to control it and not lash out at others. I use to take a walk or go up and down the stairs a few times. I even got in the car and took a drive while screaming to the top of my lungs...but I felt better and could rationally deal w/whatever was popping my cork.

If you feel that your family is always asking you to do things, then you need to learn the power of the word "no" or "I can't do it right now as I'm in the middle of something". You do have control over your life and you do not need to feel that you have to be available to everyone at a drop of the hat. Your time is just as precious as theirs.