Spouse going through MLC, need support

[job]

Amy,
You need to start eating, even if it's just some milk shakes. Get some high calories foods into your system so that you don't get sick. Yes, the stress of his mlc will create all kinds of issues for you. Have you considered going on a mild AD? Talk to your doctor and see what he/she will suggest. You can't continue down this particular path. Your kids need you.

Now about the 3 things you listed:

1. If he snaps out of the mlc, which is highly unlikely or you find a way to do so, I can promise you he will go back into crisis again. It may not be right away, but he will and it will be far worse the next time around and more harm will be done to you and your children because of the coming home and then leaving again.

2. He remains in his fog and works on his issues. Yes, the future is unknown. He could be this way for quite some time. You do realize that he had begun to detach from his family about 18-24 months prior to you being told how he felt? His crisis will last as long as he needs to face things. What do you do in the meantime? You go on w/your life as if he's died. You make a like for you and your children. Let me ask you this...what would you do if he had died? I know that's a harsh question...but I want you to think about it. Your old marriage has died...so what are you going to do about it? You are going to get yourself healthy, seek some medical advice and start planning your immediate future and what you need to do to protect you and your children. It's time to seek some professional advice and you need to call around and get some free consults from lawyers. This is not to say that you are filing, but you need to know how to protect yourself and get your ducks in a row as to your finances, child support and spousal support (if that's possible).

3. You and only you can decide when you've had enough...but you are very new to this mlc and one year is nothing when you look at the broader scheme of things. MLC can last years. Some will have a shorter crisis, others will have longer ones and some remain stuck forever. Do we know where your h will fall? Absolutely not.

Leave yesterday behind, it's the past and it's history, focus on today, as it is a present/gift. Use the present wisely and for the future, it's not ours to foresee. It's the unknown and many fear the unknown. You absolutely nothing to fear because you are a strong woman who's going to figure things out and get back on your feet.

You are going to be okay no matter what happens...but first...you need to get healthy.