Susana (2) - Learning to detach

[Sotto]

Hi Susana - you're probably having a bit of a dip due to illness and B'day - but that sounds like a good plan for GAL this week. I have 'survived' my birthday and our anniversary so far - both with no contact from H. For my B'day I just thought to myself - hey, I've had lots of great birthdays in my life. This one isn't so great - but what would life be if we didn't have a few Cr@@py birthdays? Not saying that yours will be of course - sounds like you have some nice things planned.

I think with the faith/detachment thing, it's about maintaining that kernel of optimism - that things will ultimately work out just fine. Either with H or alone. And either way, you'll be happy. This is where the detachment comes in. Truly, your future happiness does not depend on what happens with H. Our happiness is never entirely dependant on another person - and comes much from within - and part of DBing is re-attaching to ourselves and our own lives as individuals.

But in the meantime there is some 'brutal reality' to engage with - that of what is happening in our R's. But you'll get there, and FWIW, I think you're doing really well. I'm sure I wasn't doing half as well as you a couple of months in.

I hope you have a lovely day tomorrow x